moto solo

so it happened.

after joking to people in emails last night about our team dropping like flies and my taking on the 35 kids solo with one lesson plan and a broken back mike came upstairs this morning looking a rather spectacular shade of grey.

and the day went spectacularily. it wasnt 'spectacle-worthy' but i just sort of exhaled and went with every conversation, meal, class, smile and moto the day threw at me. the only proper class that took place was my afternoon class with my intermediates, 6 lovely, lovely, girls who like to ask questions, work hard and laugh at my hilarious attempts at khmai. and despite my rant on the way out the door reminiscent of edward nortons 'f-new york' monologue in the '25th hour' [and my quick english lesson introducing the words 'tough' and 'lame' ie, 'girls are tough, boys are lame'....hehe], it was kinda nice to have a chance to just sit down and chat with some of the students one on one.

i have made an effort, and so have the others, to not press the kids for their histories. we're not here to pity them, we're not here to shower them with misplaced, alienated sympathy. we're here to work with the kids as we know them and as they know us, in the present.

so when one of the girls who, at 14, has been through more than many of us could even comprehend surviving with a fraction of the intelligence and grace and unconditional warmth this young woman possesses, decided to sit me down and tell me her story during the break at lunch today, i was caught a little off guard. i am still trying to digest how this girl and her brother, who right from day one adopted me as their 'sister', could just calmly sit in front of me and rationalise with such a rare maturity the violence, abuse, and exploitation that she has experienced with the simple practicality of a repeated 'everyone's life is difficult.'

i have never met so many old souls in so many young faces.

riding home on the back of a moto as clouds to the left threw their fat raindrops horizontally, trying to catch us unawares as we rode under deceptively blue sky, my mind finally felt at home amongst the red mud, stray dogs, broken pavement and woven traffic.

and tonight held a beautiful, modest sunset.
[and i finally counted stars].